Every Scar One Day Will Heal
by Linnaboo
Summary: Emotions aren't an easy thing to handle, some wish that they didn't have them. She was one of them. He was loud and annoying, but in his own way, he was caring. And she liked that, maybe even loved it. Bellatrix Lestrange, in all honesty, had no idea what to think of Sirius Black, her blood traitor cousin. [AU, as well as TW on darker thoughts and actions.]
1. Chapter 1

Fear was not a word in Bellatrix Lestrange's vocabulary, though that did not mean it wasn't a emotion in her body and mind that she reacted to even after trying with all her being to fight away.

She could be off and torturing muggles or killing blood traitors, feeling absolutely nothing but the thrill of being in control. It was one of the things she had wanted in her life.  
>Control. Over herself, over her life, her destiny, not be tied down by having to be married to some idiotic man, who at least treated her well, she supposed. But she had no control over what was going to haunt her for the rest of her life.<br>And it didn't help that the person who had caused her to have a ruined youth was married to her favorite aunt, whom she visited just as often as she did her mother.  
>Many times Bellatrix had told herself that it wasn't her fault for what he'd done to her, but she just could not believe it. She must have done something truly terrible to deserve his punishment. And she just about got sick to her stomach every time his eyes rested on her, mocking her if she dare meet the dark orbs that were filled with horrors that were dreadful and sickening.<br>Though what he did to her, was that any better than what she did to innocent muggles (who probably deserved everything that happened to them)? The scum that every pureblood was raised to hate. She wouldn't be able to give a correct answer.  
>Because there was none.<br>Was Bellatrix guilty for her actions? Yes, but she had grown so used to the feeling that it no longer took up much of her attention anymore. She knew that she, in a way, was becoming like him.  
>Maybe not quite like him in actions, but just enough so that she was beginning to see it. It brought a twisted smile to her lips every time it came to mind.<br>And today was one of those days. She had gone to visit Aunt Walburga, thinking about what she had done the night before for only a moment after thanking Regulus for having let her inside.  
>"Hello, Dear Little Regulus," she greeted him, the twisted smile turning more into a sickly sweet one.<br>"Hello, Bella," he responded to her with an awkward smile, he was unused to Bellatrix's smiles. They were unnerving to him, after all the years he'd experienced them, too.  
>She could just about smell how nervous the younger boy was, it pleased her that she could do that to people. "How is Auntie doing?" She spoke with what people called her childlike voice.<br>"Mother's doing well, she is waiting for you in the sitting room," he'd only seen his mother minutes earlier before having gone to see what Sirius was up to in his room. The eldest Black son had his door locked and was avoiding all the family as much as possible, while smoking as Regulus had caught a whiff of the cigarette.  
>"Mmm, good," Bellatrix's attention was turned toward the stairs, or rather what was up them that she had a wonderful time bothering every time she was about when they weren't in school. "Tell her I'll be with her in a bit, I want to say hello to Sirius." Her tone changed with the smirk on her lips.<br>Regulus nodded, waving his hand as he headed in the direction of his mother. He knew there was going to be arguing and it wasn't going to be fun to listen to. More like tiring, if anything.  
>She rested a hand on the beautiful banister, running her pale hand along it while climbing up the steps to the third floor where the two boys rooms were. Her heeled-boots made soft thudding sound as she walked, the only times she went up to that floor was when she had the craving to annoy the living hell out of Sirius. A pleasure that she rarely ever did but when she did it felt satisfying.<br>Stopping at the large, wooden door of her _beloved_ cousin's bedroom. Smoothing out her skirt out of habit, she rapped a random pattern onto it. "Oh, cousin, it's Bellatrix," she called mockingly.  
>"Shit," a voice swore from the inside. Sirius knew that his mental cousin was coming over, he'd been told that she would be by his soft-headed brother who he wanted to smack more often than not. And to be blunt, he wanted to smack everyone he was related to beside Andromeda, as she was the only person he would dare call true family to him.<br>"Aw, am I not welcome?" She was pouting as she took out her wand, the door was locked and all she needed to do was a simple spell to unlock it. Did Sirius honestly think he would be able to keep her, Bellatrix Lestrange, out of his room by just locking a damn door? He was dumber than she'd first thought him to be.  
>"No, you're not welcome. I don't let stupid bitches into my room," he shot at her just as she walked into the stupidly decorated (to her) room. The colors of Gryffindor house was on the banners that were hanging in the room, it was Sirius' way of showing his pride without causing too much of a fuss, not that he cared about doing in the first place (he loved to piss off his mother).<br>The posters on his walls disgusted her. They were of half-naked muggle women on something, she believed they were called motorbikes or along that line.  
>"You mean that you don't let yourself in here?" She questioned tauntingly, looking at the fifteen year old boy that stood near the opened window, a lit cigarette in hand.<br>Sirius rolled his stormy grey eyes, taking a inhale from his cigarette and blowing it out angrily. "Can't you just go bother mother or Regulus, I don't want you here."  
>His words stung faintly, but it wasn't like she hadn't heard words like that before or said with the attitude he'd used.<br>"I'll visit Auntie later. And I already spoke to Regulus. Now it's my turn to speak with you," Bellatrix did her best innocent face (her lips slightly pouting and her looking up from beneath her lashes).  
>"'Speak' the madwoman says, what she really means is 'torment the hell out of'," he scoffed, he knew her well enough to know what she meant when she said certain things.<br>Her shrill laugh filled the room, a dark gleam in her eyes. "Or, I can do that," she had planned it that way from the start but she did so enjoy messing with the poor blood traitor's head.  
>"Oh, better yet, you can shut your pretty little mouth," he grumbled, taking another deep inhale of smoke.<br>Those words instantly stopped her, a feeling of sickness resting in the pit of her stomach. She remembered _him_ saying that to her before, to keep her from saying anything about what happened.  
>How much was Sirius like <em>him<em>? The eight years that separated the two of them kept them from getting to know each other more than the little stupid things they knew. All Bellatrix rightly knew about Sirius was that he was a Gryffindor, a blood traitor, he seemed to piss Aunt Walburga off purposely, and smoked (though she had only learned that in the past hour).  
>Sirius leaned against the wall beside the window, careful about not being too close to the curtains that hang near it as to not set them on fire, but he had his eyes on his cousin. She was standing close to the door, being eerily too silent for his liking. Never once had he seen her this quiet or calm (her face was perfectly blank as were her eyes).<br>It was difficult for him to choose what to do, if he should dare try to get her attention or leave her the way she was, but he chose to snap her out of the silence that had come over her.  
>"Bitch," he said straight to her face with annoyance but she didn't react. Usually that would have gotten him a nice, read hand print across the face.<br>What was going on with her? Did he even want to know? Well, yeah, he was nosy enough to want to know shit like that about Bellatrix, who wouldn't?  
>"Bellatrix? Bella?" Sirius gradually and cautiously moved closer to the older, dark witch. "Are you okay? Can you even speak?"<br>He wouldn't mind too much if she wasn't able to talk anymore, it saved him some headache of listening to her relatively higher than normal pitched voice that could make ears bleed if it screamed.  
>There was some clothes item on the floor that he tripped over just as he got about a foot or so away from her. Damn it, he needed to get the house elf to pick that up and wash them, because it was his bloody job to do.<br>"You're _so_ graceful, Black," Bellatrix scoffed with a half-smirk. She had snapped out of the trance like state that she'd been in when he'd tripped, rather loudly.  
>His head raised up and he made a groaning sound, he was assuming that she had planned that the whole time. It wasn't just something you could put past her. "I hate you."<br>"I know, and I you," she didn't bother hiding her feelings of hatred toward him. What was the point of that?  
>He gave a dry laugh, pushing himself up off the hard, dirty floor that could use a good cleaning. "So now that you have told me you hate me, want to leave me alone now?"<br>She let out a loud, exasperating sigh that was purposely obnoxious whilst putting one of her hands up in false surrender (she would never, ever truly surrender). "Until before I leave the house," she told him with a gleeful sounding voice that she was only using to yank his collar.  
>He'd cringed at her tone, it was so fake that it was painful to hear. "Oh, thanks. What did you do your hands?" He nodded toward the crescent shaped cuts in her palm. He wasn't concerned about it, he didn't give a damn about her, he just wanted to know what she'd done to possibly throw it out at her the next time an argument ensued.<br>Bellatrix masked her confusion of being asked that, casting a glance at her hand to see what he was talking about and suppressed a frown when she realized that she had been digging her nails into her skin. So deeply that it had started to bleed and even hurt once she took notice of it.  
>"It's none of your business, Black," she shot at him as if it was nothing to care about. Which it wasn't, not to her anyways.<br>Telling him that it was none of his business made him want to know more on why it wasn't, and if she did this before. "I'll warn you that I'm going to bother you about this every time you come up here."  
>"Just be warned that I know more hexes than you ever will," she cockily told him, turning on her heel and leaving the Gryffindor's room, feeling an emotion inside of her that was unknown to her. But she rid her mind of questions that were in there about it as she headed to the nearest bathroom to wash her hands so her aunt wouldn't take notice of what she'd done.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Sirius was laying on his bed with it's red comforter on it that was fading so much that it was hard to tell that it had once been scarlet when he first got it, now it looked the shade of a rotting tomato. Thankfully it didn't smell like such otherwise the damn house elf Kreacher would get a go kick to the ass. He hated the creature, more so just because his family treated it better than they did him.  
>It hurt to see his mother talking to Kreacher like she should have been to him, being treated like scum wasn't something that he cared for. But he'd grown so used to it that they could call him the world's largest fuck up and he'd respond to it, with a smirk on his face to show them that he wasn't going to let them hurt him anymore.<br>Lazying about was fun, when his mother was busy with company and his brother was off to one of his friend's house's. Sirius had no one to bug him or call him names (unless Kreacher came around to collect laundry or dust). One of his favorite pastimes was to read muggle magazines about motorbikes, he had a fascination for those and he hoped to have his own someday. It would be a great way to have freedom from his parents, at least he thought so. He'd mentioned that to James Potter and the messy haired, glasses wearing boy had laughed, saying that he hoped that it would work out the way Sirius had told him about it.  
>At that time he was trying to choose an ideal color for what he'd like to have, though he was mentally arguing with himself about if it would be the best idea to choose the model first before the color as it might not come in what he wanted.<br>"Do you smoke daily?" Bellatrix's voice drew him out of his magazine, it's annoying pitch sounded like something between a cat being strangled and her scratching her ridiculously long nails across a chalkboard. It was worse after a long period of silence, which was what he'd been dealing with for the past hour and a half, ever since his mother had yelled up the stairs to him to stay up there because she would be entertaining company soon and she didn't want him to mess it up.  
>Like he would do that? Actually, he would, since it was him and he loved to do things that pissed her off even if he wasn't a huge fan of the aftermath that came along.<br>Sirius lowered the magazine, resting it open on his stomach as he looked at the curly haired witch upside down. An annoyed look on his face, the reason being that she just had to come to his room. And bother him.  
>Did she get pleasure from doing it or was she getting tired of his mother as well (not that he blamed her, he just didn't want her around him)?<br>"What's it to you if I do or I don't?" He'd smoked earlier to let off some edge that had accumulated over the past few days of fighting with Regulus, the house elf, James' owl who'd bitten him, and of course his mother.  
>"Nothing, it's just this place just reeks of smoke," she shrugged airily, leaning back against the closed door. As much as she hated Sirius and the room, they were both slowly beginning to grow on her for one painful reason or another.<br>"Good answer," he rolled his eyes at the rest of her comment, he liked the smell of smoke and the sensation it gave him when he inhaled.  
>How he'd gotten started on smoking was he'd been snooping around his father's study two years earlier and snagged a cigar, he knew what it was as he'd seen Orion smoking them on many occasions. They at times smelled terribly sweet, a sickly sweet that made it tempting to try one, that he finally gave in and smoked one in his room near the window so no one would smell it.<br>Of course, he'd gotten sick from the first time smoking but after he got into cigarettes Sirius had grown accustom to what came with his activity (though the cough was annoying).  
>Bellatrix was casually walking around the messy room that had yet been cleaned properly in weeks, looking at the motorbike posters and examine the form of muggle transportation while avoid looking at the women around them. The contraptions looked strange yet oddly attractive, she wouldn't mind seeing one of those in person.<br>"Having fun judging my decorating?" Sirius glared from his upside down position, he was mistaking Bellatrix's interest for judgmental actions.  
>Black curls tumbling down her back and over one shoulder while she looked over the other, a tiny smirk in place. "Of course, there is nothing more better to do than this." He thought she was judging him, so why not play along with the poor idiot.<br>"How about being downstairs with mother and whoever else is there," he tapped his chin. Walburga was better company for Bellatrix than he, as she was more like her in beliefs and found her perfect while he hated her.  
>The woman scoffed quietly, she loved her aunt dearly but she did not make the best companion. At times like those, especially. "Not when her and Narcissa are talking about marriage and children," she winced at the two things; marriage and children.<br>"I thought you were married, Bellatrix? Wouldn't this be right down your shitty little alley?" Sirius' face had turned red from how he was laying.  
>"I am," she rolled her eyes in half-forged annoyance (she was partially annoyed already from what she'd left downstairs). "But when all you hear about is love for your husband and shit about children-"<br>"It makes you wonder why you got married, I bet," he didn't care too greatly about the conversation that was accidentally started by him opening his mouth and asking an irritated question.  
>She gave a humorless laugh, nodding in agreement to his stupidly correct comment. "Mmm," she turned away from his poster, taking a few strides until she standing in front of Sirius. Looking down at what she considered to be a baby face of his age, her own face relaxed. "Rodolphus doesn't love me. And I don't love him, I never have."<br>Sirius was just as shocked by her saying that as she was when she realized that she'd said that out loud and not thinking it just to herself as originally thought.  
>"What did you say?" Confusion laced his voice as he stared up at his elder cousin, surprised that she'd tell him anything that had to do with her personal life.<br>What had she said? It appeared that she just let out to snot nosed Sirius that her marriage wasn't a romantic sort, but rather more of a nessacery contract to have a respectful pureblood marriage that pleased her parents.  
>"Nothing, I said nothing," the lie had better work or she could always obliterate his memory of this unexpected interaction.<br>He was shocked by his own thoughts before speaking them to Bellatrix, usually he would spit out some acidy comment but the one he said was less so and slightly comforting, if that is what the word was called. "You'll find someone who will love for your crazy bitch self."  
>The older woman snorted, perhaps Sirius had been taking some sort of drug before she arrived, because it most certainly did not sound like Sirius Black talking. "You're too soft-headed, boy. I don't care if I'm ever loved."<br>"You're not like any woman I've met before," Sirius laughed at her insult slash I don't care comment while sitting up. By far, she was the uniquest female he'd come across yet he didn't believe that she was that unique to not care if she was ever loved. "Bella, have you ever been kissed?"  
>The teenage boy had one of the greatest thoughts in his mind, even if it did get him killed he wanted to do it just as badly as he wanted to get out of that house.<br>"I have a husband," that was answer enough for Sirius, though it caused suspicion to her. "What're you up to, Sirius Black?" She eyed him as he got off his bed to stand in front of her. He was already too close for comfort (whatever that truly was) for her liking.  
>"Yeah, but you don't love each other, so you want to feel what a passionate kiss is like?" His greatest plan was to see how good of a kisser his crazy cousin was, that goal showed how bored he was.<br>"What?" She blinked as if it would help her comprehend his words. She'd heard everything he'd said but didn't know how to react until her younger cousin's dry, smokey lips were against her own.  
>She wanted to murder him, with the Killing Curse. Her body was tense when it came to that physical contact and her lips were unmoving, but she indeed felt some sort of passion behind the younger boy's lips.<br>How was that possible? He was just a child and yet he had more passion than a man of her age, frankly, she didn't want to know how.  
>Sirius was enjoying himself with the kiss, but it would have been more fun if she kissed back to see how good she was at it. Though she was fair enough, and her mouth sort of tasted like lemon cake, which was a bonus.<br>"Get off me," Bellatrix finally snapped just about shrieking at him as well as slapping him hard across the face, so hard that she was positive not only his cheek was going to bruise but her hand as well.  
>"What, was it too much for you?" Sirius grinned cheekily, a red handprint visible on his cheek already.<br>"No, you little fucking-" she took out her wand, ready to curse him as she wasn't going to murder him in that house and leave the house elf to keep up the mess.  
>"Bellatrix, dear, are you still here?" Walburga's voice made Bellatrix sigh loudly, as she'd excused herself sometime earlier and hadn't returned in the time that her aunt found suitable.<br>'You're dead,' she mouthed to Sirius, her dark eyes burning with rage. "Yes, Auntie! I just stopped by the Blood Traitor's room to say hello, I'll be downstairs in a moment!"  
>"Love you, too, cousin," he laughed at the witch who gave him a quick punch to the gut, leaving him groaning as she retreated out of his room and returning to her aunt and sister's company. Hoping her lips weren't swollen from the kiss that Sirius had forced upon her, yet she mentally swore at herself for not having returned such a kiss that she'd never get a chance to experience again.<p> 


End file.
